Day: Mother's Day 2013
Time: 11:00am
Location: Overly crowded and disgusting buffet full of coughing and hacking people with dirty hands clawing onto every single scrap of food like the world was coming to an end.
Husband: Biting at the bit to get the heck out of there (cringing at the kid next to us and I think I may have even seen him wipe his brow a few times from the chaos of the place)
Me: Using my mommy forces to tunnel out everyone and everything around me and focus on Noah eating bite after bite of sweet peas from a Gerber carton while my birth mom sat eating and enjoying herself as if she were a maiden in paradise (the things you will do to make your mom happy on Mothers Day)-*daughter points
STRANGER: older white haired woman in a pink moomoo dress with garlic breath and chipped fingernails.
Back Story: (posts yet to come): Noah got a Ng tube (nose feeding tube) two days prior which was causing all of us some anxiety, discomfort, and red eyes.
Scene: Hubby, Myself, my birth mom, and Noah in his stroller sitting at a small brown table that butted up against the packed dessert buffet stand (I can never look at another chocolate fountain again without gagging after seeing what people will do to one when they think nobody is watching). I was crouched down feeding Noah his food hoping that nobody would notice me not eating the buffet food myself. It was as if each spoonful of green glop was a boxing glove to knock away the minutes until I could breathe fresh air and get out of the place.
About five spoonfuls in I feel some hands come and hold onto my shoulders. ALERT ALERT: Hubby is sitting across the table, birth mom is digging a gross shrimp vein out with her fork, and Noahs hands were trying to pull his tube out of his nose......who is touching me!?!
I slowly turn to see this stranger wide eyed, grinning, and breathing her garlic breathe on me.
Me: "Hello?!?"
Her: (in one sentence) "OhdearHappyMother'sDaywhatswrongwithyourson."
Me: (*flashing back to my prior post and thinking "this is it!) "Oh, um, uh, Thank You, um, uh, well....he had surgery a week ago and wasn't drinking enough water so they are helping him stay hydrated with a feeding tube they have put down his nose into his stomach."
Her: (*still grabbing onto my shoulders as if pinning me to the already sticky chair) "Well, he looks healthy????"
Me: "He is getting there" (*fake grin, head tilt to hopefully shrug her hands off me, questionable look back at her)
Her: mumble mumble.......then she walked away
Not a horrible experience at all. Taken by surprise yes, but not the conversation I had envisioned myself being able to stamp a "Mean People Suck!" sticker onto. I took the high road and kept my calm. I smiled. I came to a quick and simple explanation where I didn't have to dive into complicated details about my son. I didn't get snotty. More importantly, I didn't feel hurt or saddened afterwards like I thought I might have.
Afterwards I turned to my husband who nodded at me to silently say "Good job Honey!" It was like giving myself a mothers day gift finally knowing how I would respond/react to a strangers comment about my son. I was happy with the results :)
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| The "Noogie" is back...but not for too long we hope |
YAY! Good for you! I'd totally forgotten about the comments we got when B was on oxygen and the NG tube. And they came from mainly curious elderly who either have no filter or perhaps wish others would show similar concern/ask about their own health problems.
ReplyDeleteI think your little guys is adorable. My grandson was just diagnosed with Billateral Septo Optic Dysplasia at birth. It is nice to come across a blog where someone is going through tehe same experience. Thanks for posting
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't expect any less from my best friend in the whole world! You have got some serious class and a darling son to be proud of! Love you to pieces!!
ReplyDeleteI've been working on a blog post about comments from others! We've gotten the "he doesn't look sick" comment before. It's so hard to know what to say. Just kind of overwhelming because when someone asks a question, every single little detail will pop into your head and you really don't want to get into it that deeply with a stranger.
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